Fletcher Cox Claims He's Never Watched a Super Bowl But Sits on a Throne of Lies


I have to hand it to Fletcher Cox. That is an extremely bold claim to make. It’s hard to imagine that any man carved out of a solid, 310-pound block of pure American testosterone who’s made football his life’s pursuit would be doing something on Super Bowl Sunday other than watching his fellow Alphas competing. A claim that no one in the Twittersphere was buying into. So the people with way more hours in the day than the rest of us seem to have (bless ‘em), went digging and found this little nugget:



Which happened to be the same time as this:

Now I’m not going to presume that Fletcher Cox is lying. He could’ve been saying “Wow wow wow” to a million other things. According to EW, Super Bowl XLIX was counter-progammed by other compelling fare like Property Brothers on HGTV followed by Beachfront Bargain HuntCaribbean Life, and Island Life. E! was running a Total Divas marathon. MTV had a Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasy Factory takeover. And if Cox is a big Sci-Fi/horror guy, A&E was running every episode of The Walking Dead. So maybe the triple wow was he got to the scene where Sophia came out of the barn. Again, it would be unfair to say because we don’t know.

What I do know is that when someone who is not an 80-year-old woman or is working in a hospital or something tells you they don’t watch the Super Bowl, they are lying. It’s like people who claim they never watch TV. Right. As if. So what did they do on 9/11? Say “I hear there’s something big going on in Manhattan. I’ll just have to wait for the morning paper to find out what”?

I’m not saying it’s a big deal. But while the whole universe is pulling for the Eagles because the Patriots are arrogant, cheat, and win too much, at least their best players don’t lie. Thank you, Internet nerds, for getting to the truth and exposing Cox.