I'm Gonna Fuck Barney

Screen Shot 2018-01-23 at 4.37.28 PM

Lots of stuff coming out about Barney.

Plenty of people are having their takes on Barney being involved with consensual and sensual sex. Not me. I always knew that was coming. There was no doubt in my mind that Barney fucked and that he fucked long. Big time.

“I love you. You love me.” ‘You,’ in that case, is so plural that it hurts even thinking about it. The signs were all there, folks. Barney has been telling us for years that he’s a tantric fucker.

“But Chaps. I must admit that I’m not wise on the ways of tantric sex. Mind telling us what that is? I mean, I’ve gotten my dick wet a time or two but I’m still pretty new to the ins-and-outs of the ins-and-outs if you catch my drift.”

Yeah. Sure. Tantric sex is, lest we forget, from the root word of Tantra…

“Sanskrit, right Chaps?”.

That’s right. Good job. Please don’t interrupt, though. Very unbecoming. Tantra is a Sanskrit word that means ‘woven together.’ Hindu and Buddhist meditation practitioners use sexual union as a metaphor for weaving together the physical and the spiritual: weaving man to woman, and humanity to the divine. The purpose is to become one with God. Religion and sex? Nice.

So when Barney tells you that he’s not only a practitioner of tantric sex but that he’s an instructor, you know he’s fuckin good. He loves to thrust. Cant get enough of it.

“Doggie” Yes.

Reverse girl? With the best of em.

Anal? Inappropriate. The butthole is a private place. We dont talk about that.

Anyway. To answer the question, yes. I would fuck Barney because I like religion and learning stuff. Simple as that.

Also, because he’s draggin a wagon.