So I found out that Snapple apparently made the change from glass to plastic today and it devastated me. Truly the end of an era. Now before I get into this blog, let me just say that I realize that products make their ways to different cities at different times, which means people may have seen these bottles weeks or months before I did. But today was the day that innocence was lost for me.
Snapple has long been the king of iced teas in my mind. Arizona is great for when you want a vat of iced tea for a buck. I don’t know if there ever has been or will be a better bargain in life than the 99 cent Arizona. Lipton and 4C powdered iced teas both were incredible because you could drink glasses of pure sugar if your mom had a heavy hand when making that witch’s brew. Nantucket Nectars, while good, are wayyyy too bougie for the common man and woman. When push comes to shove, Snapple has always been the GOAT. It tasted great. It was allegedly made from the best stuff on Earth, which meant you could convince yourself that it was good for you. And it came in a glass bottle that was pretty much indestructible and made you feel fancy whenever you drank out of it because drinking out of glass makes you exactly 30% classier. I’d take the 16 oz. glass bottle Snapple over the 32 oz. plastic tall boy Snapple any day of the week. But it looks like the days of affordable, fancy glass bottled iced tea that made #sex noises when you banged it from the bottom are unfortunately gone.
However, we shall overcome this obstacle as we have other tragedies. Snapple has lost both the iconic Boston Tea Party label and Wendy the spokeswoman over the years. Don’t worry, Wendy…
isn’t dead! Phew, that would have been awkward. Old heads like me remember that Gatorade once had glass bottles that were removed likely in a cost cutting measure. The American consumer got over that and it will get over this as well.
It’s during times of turmoil like this that we should count our blessings. The cap still pops when you open your Snapple for the first time, you can click it when you are bored, and Snapple facts like this gem still appear under said cap.
And for the record, I am Team Lemon Iced Tea for life. Well actually now it’s Diet Lemon Iced Tea since I don’t need the extra calories. I know Kiwi Strawberry and Raspberry Iced Tea have long been favorites as well. But Lemon Iced Tea is the LeBron James of Snapple Iced Tea. It’s always the superstar that carries the team, but people love talking themselves into other options being MVP because they get bored with the same person taking home the hardware year after year. I guess you can just chalk that up to human nature.