Crazy Men's Rights Activists Have Created A 46-Minute Cut Of 'The Last Jedi' With No Females In It (Except For When They Die)

Pedestrian- It is utterly tragic that MRAs aren’t given the respect they deserve. It’s truly galling that just because their entire worldview was formed around a profound sense of entitlement induced by watching thousands of hours of harem anime, no one takes them seriously. It’s heartbreaking to think that people dismiss them out of hand just because – instead of addressing actual issues like the rates of suicide and depression among men – they focus on dumb shit like editing out all the parts of The Last Jedi that aren’t centred around men.

Uploaded to The Pirate Bay yesterday by an anonymous user, the “The Last Jedi: De-Feminized Fanedit” is, according to their own description “basically The Last Jedi minus Girlz Powah and other silly stuff“. You might be wondering how this is possible, seeing as the film is still a ways off from its DVD release date, but the intrepid nerdlinger(s) who decided to make this possible were so impatient for a version of TLJ where boys don’t get old off that they used a dodgy camrip with hardcoded subtitles.

I’m not even sure how to begin this blog. This is singlehandedly the most triggered thing I’ve ever seen on the internet. Somebody out there took the time to bootleg ‘The Last Jedi’ and edit 106 minutes out of the final cut to exclude all women and even a few minorities. Imagine being that insecure with your dick? Here’s a list of all the shit they changed about Episode VIII:

-No whiny/reluctant/murderous psycho Luke.

-NO HALDO! She simply doesn’t exist. Her whole subplot doesn’t exist. The Kamikaze is carried out by Poe. ( = Poe dies.)

-Leia never scolds, questions nor demotes Poe.

-Leia dies. Kylo kills her.

-Kylo is more badass and much less conflicted and volatile.

-Kylo takes on more of Snoke’s guards, Rey struggles with a single one.

-No bomber heroism by china girl in the beginning.

-No Canto Bight.

-No superpowered Rey.

-Luke is not a semi-force-ghost and is smashed by the first laser cannon shot. (sorry, I just had to!)

-Phasma is finished after the first blow by Finn. (Women are naturally weaker than men, she isn’t force-sensitive, and we know nothing about any exo-skeleton in her suit)

-Asian chick speaks less, doesn’t bully Finn, Finn doesn’t try to escape, she is never formally introduced. She is just there and occasionally smiles at Finn or screams “Finn!”. She has no sister. Serves her right for all the heinous stuff she did.

-Lots of little cuts reducing the number of female facial shots. Too many to count. (Pun intended.)

-Quite a few scenes rearranged so that the flow of the shortened movie is still somewhat coherent.

While I initially thought this was an over the top parody of men’s rights activists, it’s apparently very serious. Rey is a weak and nimble girl, every scene where she does something cool is cut. General Leia Organa is killed quickly and never asserts power over anybody. Finn and Rose are pretty much not in any of the movie, except for when Finn kills Phasma, oh and he does it in one blow because “women are naturally weaker than men”. Admiral Holdo is cut entirely. Poe takes her spot in lightspeeding through the Supremacy, and kills himself. Luke also dies, and they cut out whenever he was “whiny/reluctant/a murderous psycho”.

Whoever made this cut is clearly a member of our comment section, and has clearly never seen any of the original Star Wars movies. If they have, they better hate the shit out of them, because Princess Leia ain’t no damsel in distress. When Luke and Han show up on the Death Star to “rescue” her, she takes command over them and leads the way. She was much stronger with the Force than Luke, and as revealed in “From a Certain Point of View”, Yoda wanted to train her INSTEAD of Luke. Leia is the one who shows up and busts Han out of the carbonite in Return of the Jedi. Mon Mothma was the Commander-in-Chief of the Rebel Alliance who explained to the X-Wing pilots how to destroy the Death Star…twice. Star Wars isn’t “for boys” and never has been.

The cast/crew of the ACTUAL Last Jedi have commented, and their responses are as follows…

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I concur with what they had to say.