Most Obnoxious Dudes In The World Cover Dollar Bills In Shit Just To Laugh When People Pick Them Up

“Hey Ma, can you put twenty bucks in my account?”
“What happened to the twenty I gave you yesterday?”
“I literally wiped my ass with it and threw it on the ground.”
“Why’d you do that?”
“So I could hit triple digits on Snap. Just transfer it over.”
*Gun fires, followed by a loud thud.

No better way to show appreciation for mom and dad’s financial sacrifice than to literally shit all over it #amiright? They refinanced the house so you didn’t have to go to Mass Bay and you thank them by pasting their rainy day fund to the pavement using a generous serving of human shit. Don’t get me wrong, the videos are funny. They kind of remind me of that scene in Billy Madison.

But I’m more a fan of the old school college pranks. Like secretly spiking your friend’s drink with acid or kicking them square in the balls for no reason. Times have really changed. No one I went to school with would think this is funny. Mostly because we were too poor. One dollar equals one Schlitz. Which for those of you who don’t know, is like a very, very poor man’s Keystone. What Keystone is to frat parties, Schlitz is to poverty. It’s like the Detroit of beer. The only reason it’s still around is because no one has the heart to shut it down.

It’s sad to see that kids these days don’t have an appreciation for the value of a dollar. I have faith the lesson will be learned. All it’s going to take is one guy who doesn’t see the “humor” in it to put an end to the whole epidemic. But for now it looks like poop-dollaring is just starting to pick up steam. So if you see a dollar, don’t pick it up. The risk isn’t worth the reward.