You know how strippers always say they’re just trying to make money to pay for law school? Well that’s at least 3 or 4 steps up the “reasonable life choices” ladder from reffing beer league hockey games to pay for whatever the heck you’re trying to pay for.
I’ve been pretty tough on refs here on Barstool Sports [dot] com for quite some time now. But I have to admit that it takes a special kind of breed to become a beer league ref. You either have to A) love the game so much that you’re willing to head out to a local rink at 10:30pm to watch a bunch of washed up drunks try to relive the glory days and refuse to play defense for 3 straight periods just so they can feel like it’s a real game. Or B) you have to hate your life so much that you’re willing to head out to a local rink at 10:30pm to watch a bunched of washed up drunks try to relive the glory days and refuse to play defense for 3 straight periods just because you’ve completely given up on leading a life of happiness and fulfillment.
Just look at our guy here. You can’t tell this isn’t just a one time thing. You can tell that he has to put up with this shit every time these two teams play against each other. He knew it was going to be a total gongshow from the moment he got to the rink that night. It’s bad enough he has to ref a full grown man who is on the ice wearing a Mats Sundin jersey. Don’t get me wrong. I love Mats. He was one of my favorite players growing up. That being said, you don’t wear another man’s jersey on the ice. Heading to the Leafs game tomorrow night? Throw that bad boy on. I’m not one of those jabronis who say that a grown man can NEVER wear another man’s jersey. Just not while you’re on the ice playing beer league. That shit is for Justin Bieber. But yeah. It’s bad enough he has to ref a guy like that and then on top of it he can’t even keep the game moving because they’re either trying to fight or make out after every whistle and then on top of that the ref is probably getting chirped every single time he skates by both benches. So as you can tell, being a beer league ref might be the worst job in America. People who have to clean out porta potties feel bad for beer league refs. And as much as I enjoy to shit on the zebras, I have to at least give them credit for showing up every night even though every game probably brings them one step closer to ending it all.