Newest Eagles Hero, Lord, And Savior Jake Elliott Played Tennis In High School And Got Pranked Into Kicking

That little tidbit slid into my DM’s last night and has been making the media rounds this morning. What a way to spontaneously find your destiny. Like discovering plutonium by accident or falling backwards into a menage with two smoke roommates, Jake Elliott is one lucky bastard to have fate on his side during that random high school assembly. The longest FG ever made by a rookie kicker…with plenty of room to spare. Regardless, that kick was the ultimate win-win situation for Jake Elliott, who yanked a 52-yard FG attempt earlier. If he makes it, he’s a hero. If he squashes it, oh well. He’s not supposed to hit that kick. Now he’ll be revered by the Eagles fanbase forever. And by forever I of course mean until he misses his next kick and the savages immediately call for his head on a stake. You’re only as good as your last play in South Philly.

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The only thing better than Jake’s story was his parents reaction to his historic boot. Awesome.

PS – The happiest lads/degenerates in all the land in the middle of enemy Giants fan territory. Pretty sure Louis is still convinced we lost the game.