A Former Government Secretary Is In Trouble After Using County Funds To Buy Her Dog A Tuxedo

HOT SPRINGS, Ark. (AP) — A former administrative assistant to an Arkansas county official has pleaded guilty to fraudulent use of a credit card after prosecutors accused her of using public money to buy personal items, including a tuxedo for her pet pug. Kristi Goss was set for trial this week but pleaded guilty Monday. Authorities accused Goss of fraudulently charging $200,000 to a Garland County credit card on purchases including the dog tuxedo, a diamond bracelet, tickets to Arkansas Razorbacks sporting events, sequined throw pillows and pet insurance. Goss had worked as an administrative assistant for the Garland County judge in Hot Springs, about 45 miles (70 kilometers) southwest of Little Rock. The Sentinel-Record reports Goss will be sentenced Nov. 22. A gag order prevents attorneys from speaking publicly about the case.

Come onnnnnnnnnnnn. Who gives a shit? Look how cute that dog is! Money well spent in my opinion. This lady is gonna get off scot-free. Guarantee it. Did she break the law? OH YEAH. Oh yeah she did. Spending 200,000 dollars that isn’t yours is a big problem. She bought a whole bunch of shit that she shouldn’t have. But just you wait until that pup in a tuxedo melts the hearts of the jury. They’ll forget why they’re even in a court room to begin with. You know this to be true. What happens any time a dog shows up anywhere? Exactly. Everyone stops what they’re doing and starts can’t even-ing. Men, women and children cannot deny their love for dogs in any scenario. Same thing will happen with this pup who’s dressed to the 9s. Not to mention this country has bigger problems to deal with. The threat of nuclear war, white supremacists in the streets, climate change, 400 hurricanes, etc etc. What’s the problem with a little unauthorized slush fund spending on a dog tuxedo? No problem that I can see.