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Excuse Me, Detroit Red Wings. But What Exactly Are You Idiots Doing?

Minnesota Wild v Detroit Red Wings

For the first time in my lifetime (aside from the 04-05 lockout), the Detroit Red Wings didn’t quality for the Stanley Cup Playoffs last year. The last time the Wings weren’t in the playoffs was the 89-90 season. Since that point, it was 25 straight years of playoff hockey in Detroit. But then Datsyuk heads back home to Russia. Franzen hasn’t played since 2015. Zetterberg is 36. Kronwall is 36. The Glory Days in Detroit are over and missing the playoffs last season was a sign of that.

The good news for Red Wings fans is that there’s a youth movement starting already. Dylan Larkin had a big rookie year and should be ready to bounce back in year 3. Anthony Mantha kind of came out of nowhere last season. And then there’s Andreas Athanasiou.

Might not have the sexiest stats in the world. But the kid has speed, he is a finisher, and has the ability to be a 30-goal scorer. You’d think that a team who is in the middle of a rebuild would like to hang on to a 23-year-old with this much potential but it looks like Detroit is saying Athana-See-You Later. Sorry, I had to do it.

Now I don’t think that Ken Holland is actively trying to fuck this up. I can’t imagine that he’s happy about losing Athanasiou to Russia. But this is what happens when you dick around with no regard for the Salary Cap. The Red Wings currently have $0 left to spend. Franzen’s contract gets stashed in LTIR but that doesn’t give them nearly enough room to sign Athanasiou. On top of having zero dollars this year, they have to look forward to re-signing Larkin and Mantha next summer. But now the Red Wings are going to lose Athanasiou but at least they get to pay Mike Green $6 million while they miss the playoffs again and Larkin starts thinking about what Super Team he’d like to jump on.

P.S – Senator Kid Rock has to be hype about this though. Can’t imagine he’s a fan of anybody whose name he can’t pronounce correctly on the first 5 tries.

P.P.S. – Another young kid looking to jump overseas in the midst of contract negotiations:

Sam Bennett probably wants Johnny Gaudreau/Sean Monahan money from the Calgary Flames. Only problem is that he’s not worth that much. Don’t get me wrong, Bennett is a stud. Ton of potential and we saw his scoring ability in his rookie year when he put up 4 in one game against the Panthers. But again, he’s not on Gaudreau/Monahan level. That money would put the Flames right at the cap and they still need some room to sign Jagr. So what I need right now is for Sam Bennett to take whatever offer the Flames throw his way so we can speed up this Jagr process, because if he holds this shit up for any longer than I’m going to fly up to Calgary to beat his non-pull-up-doing ass myself.

@BarstoolJordie