Does This Look Like The Face Of A Lady Who Just Cashed In A $758,700,000 Lottery Ticket

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There she is, fifty-three year old Mavis Wanczyk of Chicopee, Mass. She has a thirty-one year old daughter and a twenty-six year old son. Both of whom will never have to work another day in their lives. She’s a regular  Keno player and has worked in the same hospital for the past thirty-two years. She bought the ticket Wednesday afternoon and five hours later was a gagillionaire. Picked the numbers herself too. Didn’t even believe she won until she HANDED THE TICKET to her friend. Wild move handing over a three-quarters of a billion dollar bill. Whoever it was deserves a large reward for the whole non-murder thing. At this point that’s about all we know about Mavis.

It’s obvious it hasn’t sunken in yet. I think the lottery official was more excited than her. Talking about financial literacy programs and empowering women – GTFO babe, let Mavin have her moment. Doesn’t matter though, it’s probably the last time we’ll hear from her anyways. I’m sure the illuminati has already reached out regarding travel. Mavis if you’re reading this, my Venmo is open.

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People she’s richer than: 

Taylor Swift: $150 Million
Beyonce: $350 Million
Paul McCartney: $660 Million
Lebron James: $400 Million
Rick Ross: $35 Million
Kobe Bryant: $350 Million
Tom Cruise: $550 Million
George Clooney: $500 Million
Mel Gibson: $425 Million
Leo DiCaprio: $245 Million
Drake: $140 Million
Snoop Dogg: $143 Million
Kanye West: $160 Million
Kim K: $174 Million
Katy Perry: $50 Million

You get the idea.