The Ta Ta Towel Is A Device For Helping Women Keep Their Breasts Dry After A Shower

The Indian Express- The unusual and quirky ‘boob holder’ that not only saves you from underboob sweat but is also a saviour for nursing mothers as it helps to control leakage and also doubles up as a “burp cloth”. It looks rather unusual, but if you talk about comfort and the purpose, it seems on point.

And ask any woman with slightly heavy breasts, they will tell you the hardship of tackling sweaty boobs in hot and humid weather. So, what exactly is the solution to get rid of underboob sweat? Is there any? Yes, it now exists, a towel that covers just your bosom and absorbs all the sweat. Called the ‘Ta Ta Towels’, the patented product is widely being described as a “hammock for your boobs”. Women across the world have gone euphoric over this quirky and one-of-its-kind product, and there are good reasons behind it.

I’m going to try extremely hard to avoid offending anyone with this blog. But my goodness. Women, uh… what? Do your boobs take that long to dry off? Maybe just lift them up, give them a quick wipe with a regular towel, and go about your day. Or blast them with a hair-dryer for all of 10 seconds. I’d heard that women like to dilly-dally after a shower wearing two towels–one around their body, the other creating some kind of soft serve ice cream shrine atop their head. But I had no idea they were being so cavalier as to throw on a bra before all their breast moisture had wicked away, thus exposing their bra wiring to condensation that leads to rusting, which is harmful to pregnant women born in February who enjoy kite surfing and keffir.

Just in the nick of time, the Ta Ta Towel has arrived to serve that extremely specific market. Clearly, these neck slings for your breastlings only work for women with a larger bust. But even as I wrote that, I realized that flatter-chested females don’t suffer the same perils as their buxom compatriots. Why? Because boob cheese requires a dank and shady cave to properly culture–it needs an overhang. To prevent unwanted dairy funk from accumulating beneath those wet warlocks, toss them in a sling. You’ll be high, dry, and free of the barnacles/crustaceans that typically cling to the underside of boats.

Imagine if guys did this with their balls?

Introducing the Nut Napkin! It’s a napkin that you place between your testicles and your grundle to avoid excessive perspiration so that in the unlikely event you find yourself receiving a blowjob, your girlfriend/boyfriend/dog won’t pass out from the stench of fermenting sack skin.

PS- glad to hear it helps pregnant women with leaking. That actually sounds real.