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Soft Knocks Update: Tex And His Chippy's Are Cowards For Not Even Showing Up To The Game Vs. The Purple Starfish

It’s a league game, Smokey Tex! 1-5 for the Purple Starfish, baby! Who cares if it was by default? I’ll let Homer Simpson say it best.

Hey, the league game was on the schedule, and it’s now in the books. OK, obviously we agreed to play on next Thursday so we can stream out the matchup live (the scheduled gym was not conducive for the broadcast). But come on, Tex. We still had the gym. We still had the numbers to play. We could’ve battled off camera like the real men you and your boys aspire to be. Why not show up for a pure cage match for honor and pride?
There’s zero excuse. And that’s after talking sick triceratops in Jurrasic Park amounts of shit.

Not a good look for Tex and the Chippy’s. That’s what we call all talk and no walk.

I’m giving Tex a chance to somewhat redeem himself a bit on Gametime Poker today at 4pm LIVE ON TWITCH as we battle on the virtual felt. Gonna be real interesting to see Tex attempt to play poker, think, and form sentences at the same time. It’s going to be like one of those social experiments where chips attempt to fit blocks of shapes into their respective holes. As for the stakes, loser castrates the winner. Kidding but not really if I even mention the idea out loud and there are no adults present. Things get weird while shooting the shit on that show. We’ve found out Tex’s father left him at his family for good at a Dairy Queen Drive-Thru (seriously) and, most recently, Nate manifesting fully into his Spider Monkey form and snatching away a computer in the middle of a live show. Good times. Maybe.

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PS – The videos of Soft Knocks take a LOT of time to produce, so keep your pants on, people. They’ll be out when they’re ready. You can watch Soft Knocks: The Story Of The Barstool Sports Rec League Basketball Dynasty – Episode 1 here.

PPS – Bump.