And there it is. The final of the Bangable 5. The end of a blogging era. A moment of silence, please.
You see, it all started one February day back in 2015. I was scrolling the Internet looking for something to blog, and came across a list of the 5 oldest women, all of whom were born in the 1800’s. So I did the only logical thing, and ranked them in terms of bangability. The order in which I would have sex with them, if you will.
One by one, we lost our sweet angels.
First we lost the blow job queen Misao
Then we lost the bald bombshell Gertrude
Then sweet, sweet Jeralean was reunited with the Underground Railroad in the clouds
Then last May, my dear Susannah Banana was taken aways from us
And now, the last woman, and human on Earth born in the 1800’s has passed away. What am I supposed to jerk off to now? Someone born in 1900’s? My dick doesn’t get hard for the 1900’s!
So RIP to Emma Morano, the Milan Minx herself, the Sexy Sicilian, who has ascended to the heavens to join the rest of her friends in the great gang bang in the sky.
My thoughts and lube go out to our beautiful old ladies, who gave us so much and asked for so little. Goodnight, sweet Emma. We’ll miss you.