*Record Scratch* You Might Be Wondering How She Got Into This Situation

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The classic try to slide down a little waterfall into the water but instead you slice your butthole open from end to end whilst bruising the rest of your entire body: a spring tradition like no other.

I enjoy a cool dip more than anyone. The weather is hot and the water is cool. The moment your privates enter the water your internal temp drops 15 degrees. The magic of science. On the converse, nearly breaking your neck because you underestimated your chubbiness factor can certainly be disheartening. Hate to see it. The whole party is ruined because Nancy is sitting on the edge of the water nursing her wounds and wheezing. Fucking Nancy. We told you not to do it but noooo. You had to scream #DARTYSZN and let it rip.