Mom Says Her 2 Year Old Son Is Lou Gehrig Reincarnated
Yahoo - Ever want to know what it was like to watch legendary New York Yankees first baseman Lou Gehrig play in person? How did the ball sound off his bat? What was the fan reaction every time he came to the plate? Up until now, you needed to find someone who saw Gehrig in person, and hope they could accurately describe those things. But that may change soon. If Christian Haupt and his mother, Cathy, are right, baseball fans will get a chance to experience what it was like to see Gehrig in action. That’s because they believe the reincarnated spirit of Gehrig lives on in Christian. It’s not a joke, either. Cathy Haupt believes so strongly that her son was Gehrig in a past life that she’s written a book about his experience. That book is “The Boy Who Knew Too Much” — it’s out Tuesday and it chronicles how Christian and Cathy came to that realization. The movie rights for “The Boy Who Knew Too Much” have already been picked up by 20th Century Fox, according to Deadline, with the team that did “Miracles from Heaven” at the helm. The book is mostly based on stories and statements Christian made to his mother when he was 2. It all started when Christian told his mother he “used to be a tall baseball player.” He would also recall stories of traveling to hotels by train. Christian hadn’t been exposed to baseball at that point in his life, and wouldn’t know anything about traveling by train, so that piqued Cathy’s interest. Her belief that her son was actually Gehrig reincarnated grew stronger after some simple Internet searching. Upon seeing a picture of Gehrig next to Babe Ruth, Christian reportedly told his mom that the two don’t talk to each other. Cathy looked into that, and discovered the two teammates had a falling out at some point. Cathy has also talked to a psychiatrist and a past-life regression therapist. Both have fueled her belief that her son is actually the living spirit of Gehrig. Under hypnosis, Cathy reportedly recalled her past life as Gehrig’s mother. The therapist researched one of the stories Cathy told while under hypnosis, and found there was some evidence it actually happened. And so … yeah … that’s how one mother came to believe her son was the living embodiment of baseball legend Lou Gehrig. We aren’t entirely sure where to go from here.
Who is the biggest asshole in this story:
A) The mom who makes up some dickhead story about her two year old son being a 115 year old baseball player reincarnated.
2) The two year old son going along with his dumb ass mom’s bananatown story
D) The people who are actually believing this story
Its a three horse race and its gonna be a photo finish, folks. I think we’ll begin from smallest asshole to biggest:
3rd Biggest Asshole: The 2 year old. This fuckin kid, man. I know its not his fault. He’s only 2. His mom made up some story to sell books and hes goin along with it. Still shitting in diapers and just running around telling people whatever his mommy says. Cant blame him…except only, I can. Because that kid is gonna grow up to be a dick. He’ll be the kid who lies about dumb shit to sound cool or have friends. He’ll tell everyone he got a blowjob over the summer at camp because nobody was there and can call him out on it. Hes the guy who tells you that his dad is rich or invented something or some other dumb shit. Kid sucks.
2nd Biggest Asshole: The Mom. Make no mistake about it, this mom is a huuuuuge asshole. Making up a lie like this and exploiting your kid to your sell books and make money…big time dickhead move. Rather than letting your kid just live a normal life you’re making him live like some weirdo who thinks hes a dead baseball player. Now, dont get me wrong I’m all about cashing in on your kids. Raising those little fuckers is hard and as a parent you should get to make some money off em as soon as you can. Whether you wanna run suicides until they puke so they all play basketball at UCLA and make it to the NBA, or you wanna trick them into thinking they’re Lou goddam Gehrig so you sell books, its up to you. But lets call a spade a spade, you do this to your 2 year old and warp their brain and not even give them a chance to just have some normal friends, you’re an asshole.
1st Biggest Asshole AKA the Biggest Asshole: The people buying this. I’m not talking about Fox literally buying the rights to the movie. That, I can understand. I mean, the whole thing is literally a Matt Christopher book. This whole thing has already been done.
Smash hit from 50 years ago. When a kid meets the reincarnated spirit of Babe Ruth – a mysterious man named “George Baruth” – he hits home runs. Magic. This mom just basically tweaked the tale, switched from Ruth to Gehrig, and bingo bango she’s got herself a book and some movie rights.
That, I’m OK with. People love a good fictional story about kids and sports. Its how Disney makes zillions. So shout out to Fox and anybody who just likes a heartwarming story about magical children. But, make no mistake about it, if you believe anything about this woman – the story, the psychiatrist, the hypnosis – ANY of that shit, you’re the biggest asshole in the world. You’re a sucker and you’ll probably buy this memoir and buy the movie tickets and Cathy Haupt will laugh all the way to the bank. Hopefully she’d put that money away for the years of therapy that Christian will need when he’s an adult that needs to come to grips with the fact that his mom convinced him he died of ALS in a previous life so she could sell books.
They’re assholes. She’s an asshole. And he’s an asshole.