The Uber CEO Can't Be That Bad If He Took His Employees To An "Escort-Karaoke Bar"

NY Post- Uber boss Travis Kalanick and five of his employees visited a sleazy “escort-karaoke” bar in South Korea — a fact that one top Uber exec has scrambled to keep quiet in recent weeks, according to a report. Kalanick’s ex-girlfriend Gabi Holzwarth says she was with Kalanick and the higher-ups at Uber in mid-2014 when they went to the seedy Seoul saloon, where miniskirt-clad women “sat in a circle, identified by numbered tags,” according to The Information (paywall), a tech news site.  “After picking women, visitors typically headed downstairs to get acquainted with the women and sing karaoke before going home with them,” according to the report.

The mark of any good boss is to keep their underlings happy and I’m not sure if an “escort-karaoke bar” can exude anymore happiness. I’ve never heard of one of these hybrids but it sounds pretty damn intriguing. Karaoke is already the most fun drunk activity there is and then you want to add in some fun-loving escorts? Excuse me while I go board a flight to Seoul.  Look how fun karaoke already is without girls getting paid to “hangout” with you!

The adrenaline that pumps through your veins while drunk and singing karaoke has got to be the same effect Walter White’s Blue Sky had on his clients. I’ve been waiting on pins and needles for the next Barstool Karaoke night like Lumière and the crew waited for the Beast to find true love.

Not to mention doing karaoke in South Korea is basically the same thing as eating Pizza in Italy or playing Hockey in Canada. When in Rome do as the Romans do. An escort could look like an extra from Hocus Pocus and I’ll be happy with throwing some of my hard-earned cash at her as long as she knows every word to Bohemian Rhapsody or Paradise by the Dashboard Light.