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Georgia Shopping Mall Robbed By Feminists Upset Over Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Calendars

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BUFORD, Ga. — As shoppers bustled about a busy Georgia shopping mall Saturday, a couple of thieves made off with $2,000 worth of calendars from one of the kiosks inside. But the owner says it was no ordinary theft. Jessica Roy, who describes the thieves as a young white couple, made off with more than 100 calendars all showing men and women scantily clothed, like the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders. They left a dozen chastising signs in their place.

“They were pre-printed signs (and) all the messages on the signs basically say the same thing that they just didn’t agree with basically having the human body as meat on display,” Roy said. Roy only sells the calendars three months out of the year and works on commission. She says the theft has cost her all her profits for this season and likely means she will not be able to give her employees bonuses as the end of the year. “They’re on consignment, but I’m responsible for them,” she says. “Not only do I sign a security deposit, which now I’ll lose, I’m also responsible for any merchandise that’s missing.” Roy is offering a reward for their return or information leading to an arrest in the case. “I’m pretty forgiving … you want to bring them back crumpled and wet and soggy and put them in a box or bag and leave them for me, that’s fine,” she says. “I can write off damaged products; I can’t write off missing product.”

 

 

2 Major points I’d like to address in this story.

 

1. “describes the thieves as a young white couple”

Annnnd there he is. The most pussy whipped man in America. Look everyone has been dragged to the mall at some point in their life. Everyone has gone shopping with a girl and been in personal hell. It’s what guys do in exchange for sex, there is no shame in that game. You find a chair, follow scores on your phone and look up every 10 minutes to say that outfit looks fine. Just use a little mental toughness and you get the keys to the castle (anal). But if you’re spending your Saturday afternoon ransacking mall kiosks, stealing all the cheer-leading magazines to “stop the sale of misogyny” then you need to re-evaluate your entire strategy. There are easier ways man. Ways that don’t betray every man in the world because your feminist girlfriend has body issues and refuses to do a few crunches. Which brings me to my second point…

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2. This doesn’t stop the sale of misogyny, this just hurts men that are already hurt. I mean who buys a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader calendar anyway? It’s probably a married guy  that hates his life and isn’t allowed to look at porn so he buys this calendar and and buries it in a file cabinet so he won’t get yelled at by his wife. Then once a year when his wife is out taking the kids apple picking and he has the house all to himself he pulls out the calendar, lights a couple of candles, and jerks off to a clothed Ms. August. That’s a calendar buying guy right there. You’re hurting that man. Not me, or the million of men that own the internet and free porn and misogyny 24/7/365, you’re hurting that guy. A guy who can’t even jerk off when he wants to. You’re the anti robin hood. You just stole from the poor and left the rich alone, and that more than any other political or societal stance you’re taking, is beyond fucked up.

 

 

 

h/t drew