Obese Ohio Woman Was Found Molded To Her Chair. Not Good!

TOLEDO, Ohio — Residents in a Springfield Township neighborhood had no idea one of their neighbors was living in squalor until emergency vehicles lit up their typically quiet street, the Toledo Blade reported.

The smell of human excrement reached the sidewalk as emergency responders worked to remove a 550-pound elderly woman from her living room chair Thursday evening. Barbara Foster, 75, had been sitting in the same place since July 2016 — long enough for her body to weaken and her skin to mold to the chair’s shape, according to a Lucas County Sheriff’s Office report.

Poor Barbara. I can see how this type of thing happens. It’s a hot, July morning in 2016. You just walked to the mailbox and, when you get home, you see your chair, so you decide to take a load off and sit down.

Oh fuck. That feels good. The chair just forms to your body in ways that you never thought possible. You snuggle up good. Hell, you might never move again.

Fast forward a few months and you actually haven’t moved yet. Your skin has grown into the couch a little bit but nothing to be alarmed about. The stink, though. Oh that stink. That’s when the regret sets in. It’s at this point, 7 months later, that you realize that you should have gotten up to poop and pee. Hindsight bias is 20/20. No one is perfect. Sure, your house is condemned but that’s something that can be rectified later after your bones heal and the skin grafts are complete.

Get well soon, Barb! This is a judgement-free zone.