Chance The Rapper has announced his Spring 2017 Tour! I don’t know much about Chance the Rapper as I don’t listen to much rap made after the final episode of Flavor of Love, but I do know Chance is basically the #1 guy in the game right now. He seemed like a good guy at the Grammys and No Problem is a fire jam therefore I am Team Chance. I started to like him even more after I saw what he was offering for his tour’s VIP packages. Takes guts. We need guts.
You can play Rock, Paper, Scissors with Chance for the small price of $75! I personally don’t think this is that terrible. That’s basically the price of a video game nowadays so why not spend that shit on playing a classic game of RPS with your hero? You also get his signature “3” hat which means it’s basically only $50. That may be my gambling mindset speaking, but either way that’s a steal and a half. Count me in.
Now this package is a bit scary. $250 for a selfie to be tweeted and you don’t even get the “3” hat! The only person that should knowingly pay for that is the Son of Sam and that’s only if his neighbor’s dog told him to. You know what you could do with $250? You can buy 3 (ok, maybe 2) weeks worth of lunch, you can buy a new phone if you go through Boost Mobile, or you could even buy tickets to the Red Hot Chili Peppers at the Garden this weekend! Even if I loved Chance like I love my dog, I would never want the the fact that I paid $250 for a selfie with someone to be documented on Twitter. I don’t care if it’s Henrik Lundqvist, Guy Fieri, or the Ghost of Abe Lincoln…hard pass.