John Mayer Tweeted (Then Deleted) That Taylor Swift's Birthday Is The Lamest Day Of The Year

Ok, do we know for a fact that John Mayer was talking about Taylor Swift there? No we don’t but then why would he delete it? Exactly. I don’t mind the tweet. I’m okay with taking shots at exes on social media. That’s what it’s for. Blah blah blah whatever.

But to be completely honest, I’m not here to talk about John Mayer and Taylor Swift. I couldn’t give less of a shit about their relationship or past relationship or whatever happened. I’m here to talk about John Mayer. Nay. I’m here to talk to John Mayer. Sup John? Big fan. HUGE fan actually. Love your work. Continuum is one of my favorite albums. It’s honestly one of the few albums you can bring up in a large group setting and everyone will just agree that it’s awesome. Anyway. Brass tax. What’s the deal with you not having a Christmas album? That seems like something that should exist. Kinda fucked up that it doesn’t. Literally every artist who has ever existed has come out with a Christmas album. It’s a cash cow. If you’re a popular musician (you’re one of those, John) making a Christmas album is the easiest thing to do. You don’t have to write anything. You just do your thing over pre-written music. And it’s timeless and becomes popular every 12 months. You know who I don’t really give a shit about? Mariah Carey. You know who I fall in love with for three straight weeks every December? Mariah Carey. That’s the effect Christmas music has on people.

Do it, John. For me. For all your fans. A John Mayer Christmas album would go over like GANGBUSTERS. Female John Mayer fans would be dripping wet as you sang about Santa Claus coming to town and male John Mayer fans would love it just as much. Do it dude.  It’s time.