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This Young White Fella Can Really Cut A Rug

Man it would be cool to be a white kid who was unexpectedly successful in a traditionally African American realm! Goals! In reality, I was probably one of the kids in the background bouncing around like a sugared up pogo stick while Mr. Roboto here flexed his 9-year-old dance chops in front of a bunch of 5-year-olds. Yeah, you can swim in the kiddy pool, but can you Step Up? Can you Step Up 2 The Streets? Cause those are the questions everyone is going to be asking. You don’t wanna Moon Walk too close to the sun.

And how about this other kid that tries to dance in on him and share the spotlight.

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Uh, I don’t think so dickhead. Get your own thing.

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To the star kid’s credit, he is actually on beat and is acknowledging the music. I see too many kids (and adults) who watched the Jabawokeez once and learned some little hand rolls or tutting routine, but are just completely off beat. With any art (stop me if I sound too high) the soul of whatever you are doing is more important than any technicality. Or maybe my boy Popping Pete could show you better than I could tell you.

What a shock, dancing should be on beat. God though, it genuinely would be sweet as fuck to be able to pop and lock along through life, on beat or not. But I fucking can’t.

So I’m stuck, just like you, watching the best dancers of all time battle the shit out of each other while I just salivate on the sidelines, daydreaming of something that never will be.