In Case You Missed It: October 17-21
On any given day, there could beat least 75 new posts up on this goddamn website. Now granted, there are always some re-blogs and at least 20 wake ups/GTA’s/Smokeshow posts, but there’s still a shit ton that goes on every day. Between all those posts and listening to all the podcasts and trying to actually do a little bit of real work throughout your week, it’s easy to see how you would miss some things here and there. Even if you’ve signed up for the BARSTOOL SPORTS RANDOM THOUGHTS NEWSLETTER (sign up here), there are still some posts that just fall through the cracks. So that’s where In Case You Missed It comes in. A quick week in review on Friday afternoons highlighting the major stories from Monday-Friday for those of you who aren’t able to sit there and read every single post (or just wait for the second something is posted so you can be the first to comment about how shitty the blogger is).
Monday October 17
– While I’m very much looking forward to this election finally being over with, there’s no denying that Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are the best things to ever happen to SNL. So at least we have that going for us.
– There were plenty of rumors afloat on the interwebs regarding PFT Commenter’s sexual orientation. He is here to claim that he is, in fact, not a woman. Gonna still need to see a 2nd source to confirm.
– I’m genuinely concerned that Trent is going to take a driver to the skull the next time he lets somebody smack a golf ball out of his mouth. You can’t taunt death 3 times in a row and still get away with it.
– “Wish I was up in that ass” is the pick up line that is sweeping the nation. See for yourself if it gets you laid this weekend.
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Tuesday October 18
– If you’re already a father or if you just need another reason to use all precautionary methods to not become a father any time soon, then subscribe to the Podfathers podcast. It’s just KFC, Clem and Chaps bragging about having sex for an hour.
– In the most Canadian news of all time, a thief rappelled through the ceiling of a sporting goods store to steal $150,000 worth of hockey sticks.
– There is a McDonald’s opening at the Vatican because the Pope is tired of eating the body of Christ every day and just wants to enjoy some Chicken Selects and McFlurries before he dies.
– Trevor Bauer is an absolute maniac and wanted the Indians staff to burn his gross disgusting finger shut. Obviously with a last name like Bauer, he was born to be #HockeyTough.
Wednesday October 19
– Love him or hate him, it’s pretty difficult to not give at least a little fist pump for Pres when Mr. Kraft told him the three most important people to the Patriots are Brady, Belichick and Portnoy.
– Here’s a little piece of advice for Carlos “Half Head” Rodriguez–when you’ve only got half a skull, it’s gonna be pretty fucking difficult to get away with attempted murder and arson. Not exactly easy to lay low when your skull looks like a cereal bowl.
– The Cleveland Indians are headed to the World Series for the first time since 1997. If the Indians win the WS the same year the Cavs won the NBA Championship, I’ll be convinced the Apocalypse is upon us.
– This story about Milmore getting fucked up on pot gummies is a Hall of Fame story.
Thursday October 20
– Speaking of the Hall of Fame, this “Yabo” call from SVP was a 15/10. #VapeLife
– This old dude hates yoga pants so I mean this in the nicest way possible, but maybe it’s time for him to just go.
– I’d like to get the home address for the CEO of Nintendo so I can personally mail him all of my money for the Nintendo Switch.
– The most factual and correct headline of the week goes to KFC–Josh Brown Is A Complete And Total Piece Of Shit.
Friday October 21: That is today.
Bonus:
– Barstool Idol auditions start on November 2 and will be every Wednesday after that. So if you want to disappoint your parents like I did and choose to work for this website, here’s your chance.
– Want to watch Smitty fight Nate on his knees? Of course you do. Now I have no idea how this actually works but I guess enough people have to download the app for it to happen. So download the app. Tell your friends to download the app. Tell your aunts and uncles and grandparents and creepy next door neighbors to download the app. And then… it’s on.
– If you live in the Greater Philadelphia Area, then I’ll see your ass at the Air Sex World Championship tomorrow night.
Smokeshow of the Week/Possibly Century: Dominique from Delaware.
