Three Sixers "Juju On That Beat" And It Will Be The Most Uncomfortable Thing You See Today
There might be some older folks who are reading this that are wondering what the fuck a “Juju On That Beat” is, and that’s a fair question. Well, for all you cloud yellers, it’s a new dance craze that’s sweeping the nation. Why, its just like the Bop, the Twist, the Nitty Gritty, or whatever other archaic dance move you geriatric fucks came up doing. Last year, things like the Dab, the Hit Dem Folks, the Quan or the Millie Rock were popular enough to make it out of clubs and high school lunch rooms to the main stream. If you’re not pugged into Black Twitter, you might recognize them the most from Odell Beckham Jr.’s touchdown celebrations.
The Folks:
The Millie Rock:
These are all tidbits of information du jour that you should file away in the old memory bank, lest you wind up like Loretta Sanchez, looking old and out of touch as fuck. What those moves were to last year, the Juju is to this year. A transcendent dance move, viral sensation off of which the Philadelphia 76ers were clearly trying to capitalize. Only that’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works. This is how it’s supposed to look:
And this is how it did look:
These poor guys. Robert Covington did fine, I suppose, but his backup dancers really let him down. They’re like Diana Ross and the Supremes, if the Supremes were two over-sugared under-medicated pre-teens who were trying to fit in at a new school.
TJ, could ya look more uncomfortable?
Nik, could ya spazz out any more on that Running Man?
I know it’s pretty much a setup, the old “let’s get the two white guys on the squad to do a popular new dance and see how awkward they look”, but man, we really fell into that trap. And I love the end of the video that says “Get Ur Tickets Now!” What about this video makes someone want to purchase basketball tickets? Because the players won’t be Juju-ing On The Beat at any game you pay to see? Because the Sixers Dance Squad/Flight Team will be the best action we see on the court this season? It’s truly befuddling.
The clear lesson we should take from this is that white folks shouldn’t be mixing themselves up in this type of culture. We shouldn’t try to be cool. We shouldn’t be trying new urban dance moves. We certainly shouldn’t be rapping. It’s just embarrassing ourselves.
h/t John Larson