(Source) – Let the word ring out across the land: President Barack Obama has declared that once you are past third grade, you must stop putting ketchup on hot dogs. On Sunday’s season premiere of Anthony Bourdain’s “Parts Unknown,” the president discussed food and foreign policy over noodles with the celebrity chef in Vietnam. Somehow the talk turned from the bowls of bun cha pork and noodles in front of them to the ballpark favorite. “Is ketchup on a hot dog ever acceptable?” Bourdain asked the leader of the free world in an episode taped in May. “No,” the president quickly responded. “I mean that … that’s one of those things like, well, let me put it this way, it’s not acceptable past the age of 8.”
I didn’t think that I’d get passionate about politics at age 28 but here we are in 2016 with a psychotic celebrity as a major party’s nominee and an elected official trying to tell me what I can and can’t put on my pig hoof paste sandwich (a hot dog is not a sandwich, but you get what I’m saying). Listen, Barry, if that is your real name, I’ll put all the sugary, tomato icing I want on my hot dog. What do you even know about hot dogs, dude? Have you ever had one? Pretty sure your religion forbids the eating of pork, Barack Hussein Obama. Don’t come into America and try teaching me how to eat the most American food ever. I was born here. I was raised here. You? That’s anybody’s guess. It’s impossible to know where your loyalties lie as long as we ignore your birth certificate and all that fancy stuff.
Fact of the matter is that people should be allowed to enjoy our freedoms however we see fit, without a president telling us how to live our lives whenever he decides he needs a break from trying to take our guns or trying to make us get gay married. I’ll put ketchup on my hot dog all I want. I’ll put ketchup, spicy mustard, relish, and onions on my hot dog and it will be fucking delicious. Go to hell, Obama. Idiot.
PS – Yeah, I’ll drink Wannamango beers too. I’m an adult male who likes ketchup hot dogs and mango beers. Suck my dick.