Two Girls Sharing A Tinder Profile Have A Weird Way They Want To Approach Hanging Out With Guys

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In general I think whenever I’ve seen two girls sharing a Tinder profile I roll my eyes the same way I would when I’d see girls put they’re married or engaged to one of their sorority sisters on Facebook. But in this case, I could totally see how it’s a viable way to settle a dispute between two women. Women are always competing with other women, who has the best hair in the room, nicest clothes, slimmest labia, a dick measuring contest for those without one. And with how much girls talk shit behind each other’s backs, the competition amongst friends is probably even stronger. So let’s just remove the false pretenses and go after it, two women of different ages and backgrounds going head to head with random dudes serving as the impartial judges. It’s like an old fashioned duel but so empowering for women (or the exact opposite for whatever) but either way I’m all in. Go Team Youthful Asian.

 

And here we are, another hot summer Friday full of steamy, moist Tinder blog goodness. What’s new this week in the wide world of dating apps? Let’s find out. Don’t forget to follow me on Twitter and send in your screenshots because lord knows I need to work smarter not harder in the warmer months and let’s go!

 

 

TR-gonnaneedsomeclarificationonthetrichomasbeforewemoveforward

Great work lady but I’m gonna need some clarification on the trichomas before moving forward (via TR)

 

 

BC-ontheonehandsorryaboutthecheatingontheotherhandatleastyoudatedadesirablecommodity

On the one hand sorry about all the cheating. On the other hand at least you dated a desirable commodity, that’s got to make you feel good by proxy (via BC)

 

 

KE-unrealflowonazamiljimmyneutronwouldshitinhisownhatifheknew

Unreal flow on Azamil here, Jimmy Neutron would shit in his hat if he knew (via KE)

 

 

D-notimpressedbybeingabumblecheerleaderanymorebutthelevetationisprettydope

Being a cheerleader on Bumble is pretty commonplace from what I see these days but being able to levitate? Now that’s an impressive feat worthy of your right swipe (via D)

 

 

BW-LoloJonesseemsmorelikethechristianmingletime

Lolo Jones seems more like the Christian Mingle type (via BW)

 

 

BB-itpainsmewheniseegirlswhocouldbeprettyhotifonlytheywerelikeentireltydifferenthumanbeings

It pains me when I see girls who could be pretty hot if only they were like entirely different human beings (via BB)

 

 

JC-NEEDSBLURnodaniellethatsaverybaddanielle

(via JC)

 

 

DS-listenimimpressedallaroundbutherbeingsmallinatreeremindsmeofakeeblerelf

Listen I’m impressed all around but being small in a tree completely makes me think of a Keebler elf (via DS)

 

 

SNS-ialwaysswiperightforgirlslikethisbutidontthinkicoulddateagirlwithlegitbetterabsthanievercould

I always swipe right for girls like this but I don’t think I could actually date a girl who currently has more muscular abs than I ever possibly could (via SNS)

 

 

JT-isitevennoteworthytoseechallengepeopleonbumblewhentheyallseemtobe

TPJ-PAIRWITHOTHERCHALLENGECHICK

Challenge chicks on the apps are getting much less special by the day and frankly doesn’t do it for me quite as much as the cheerleaders (via JT, TPJ)

 

 

SW-cheerleadersonbumbleandholyshitdoesmarkcubanknowhowtostylehissquad

See? Now that’s a noteworthy Bumble cheerleader. And of course Mark Cuban knows how to have his cheerleaders dressed to bring heat (via SW)

 

 

D-andthenyouhaveseeminglydyedpithairhowaboutsomeconsistencybumble

…And then you have seemingly dyed pit hair, how about some consistency, Bumble? (via D)

 

 

JT-bruinsreporterswithweirdlyunflatteringphotochoicesneedbumblelovetoo

But Bruins reporters who choose weirdly unflattering photos apparently love Bumble too, so we’ve got that going for us (via JT)

 

 

CC-PAIRWITHBRUINSREPORTERandonefortheladiestoowhilewerehereiguess

…And one for the ladies while we’re doing hockey people in which I have no clue whom they are (via CC)

 

 

B-suchashannanspelledwithanAmove

Such a Shannon spelled Shannan kind of Tinder bio (via B)

 

 

LWL-shehasaninstagramandwantedapicwithbilzeriansoithinkthatmeansshewascontractuallyobligatedtofuckhim

She has an Instagram account and wanted a pic with Dan Bilzerian so I think that makes her contractually obligated to have fucked him (via LWL)

 

 

JD1

JD2-cantbeaworserapperthantikotexas

Can’t be a worse rapper than Tiko Texas (via JD)

 

 

JL-notabadbalancebythisguybutyouvegotokeepthatupdatedwithinatleastlastsixmonthswhoknowshowmuchyouhadinvestedinthepound

Not a bad bank balance by this guy but you’ve got to keep that updated within at least the last six months. Who knows if you developed a bad coke habit or invested heavily in the British pound? (via JL)

 

 

SD1

SD2-soapparentlythisisomesortofaussiepornstargonnaneedmoreinfoherefolks

So apparently this is some sort of Aussie pornstar and yeahhhhh I’m gonna need a name for future research here folks (via SD)

 

 

shrug-activismandmagicthegatheringwouldberankedonmyinterestssomewhereafterrootcanalsandgettingairconditionerwaterdrippedonme

Well the cop/troops part will go over well but I’d also rank “activism” and “Magic the Gathering” somewhere on my list of interests beneath root canals, forcible sodomy, and getting air conditioner water dripped on me (via Shrug)

 

 

 

O-yourcompetitionfortheweeksnamemustbeextraironicwhenhegoestodepositmoneyatthebank

Your competition for the week’s name must be extra ironic when he goes to deposit money at the local Bank of America (via O)

 

 

VC-bigtitconfidenceonfulldisplay

Big tit confidence on full display here and you just know with her naughty hat that she’s always willing to dump em out when drunk at parties (via VC)

 

 

shrug1

shrug2-thischickseemsimpossibleformostofustodealwithbuthonestlykindawould

This chick seems impossible for most of us to deal with but honestly kinda would solely based upon physical merits. No no don’t applaud me, you have to have the courage to stand up for what you believe in. I’m no hero. (via Shrug)

 

 

And onto the hot and NSFWish ones…

 

 

MP-HOTNSFWfarawaybuttshotsevenworkifyoudontlooklikeagirlwhohasabuttitscrazy

(via MP)

 

 

MS-HOTNSFWunbelievablysexyeventhoughithinkshehashugenips

Unbelievably sexy photo but for some reason it makes me feel like she’s got huge nips (via MS)

 

 

CR-HOTNSFWitsgoodtoknowthatLAtinderlivesuptothevisionsofitinmymind

It’s good to know that LA Tinder lives up to the visions of it in my mind (via CR)

 

 

CA-HOTNSFWprettyhotbutwerelikeonemoreyearbeforegravitywreakinghavoconbralesslife

So hot but we’re like one year away before gravity is going to wreak havoc on braless life here (via CA)

 

 

JR-HOTNSFWEVERYONESIMULTANEOUSLYTHROWSUPTHEIRHANDS

mean-girls-raising-hands

(via JR)

 

 

FB-HOTNSFWhbohulunetflixandwwenetworkareallyours

So does a combo of HBO, Hulu, Netflix, and WWE Network get anal? I’ll throw in Spotify if I have to but this is a negotiation (via FB)

 

 

AP-HOTNSFWsomuchcheeks

So much cheeks (via AP)

 

 

CR-damnitdaniel

Damn it Daniel (via CR)

 

 

S-HOTNSFWjessepinkmanismasturbatingthroughsomebinocularssomewhereinthedistance

Jesse Pinkman is currently masturbating through a pair of binoculars somewhere in the distance (via S)

 

 

ECS-HOTNSFWforsomereasonthispicscreamsdickwreckertome

For some reason this pic screams dick wrecker to me (via ECS)

 

 

EP-HOTNSFW

“UNG” is also the sound I made seeing dat ass (via EP)

 

 

CMCD-HOTNSFWimpossibletogetmoremurderedinapairbuttphotothanthegirlontheleft

It’s impossible to get more murdered in a tandem butt photo than the girl on the left here did (via CMCD)

 

 

RM-HOTNSFWihatethisangleofbuttshotandthesandmakesitevenworseantifarawaybuttshot

I hate this angle of butt shot and it makes every butt look worse. It’s like the anti-far away butt shot. Sorry to look the butt shot gift horse in the mouth but I want to help (via RM)

 

 

JOC-HOTNSFWtheheftofthissideboobisabsolutelytremendous

The heft of this side boob is absolutely tremendous (via JOC)

 

 

PG-HOTNSFWimnotcheckingtheinstagrambutithastobethechickontheleftrightyoucantposewiththosetitswithoutowningthem

I’m not checking the Instagram just for the sake of this joke but it has to be the chick on the left in this pic…you can’t pose with those tits on the left without being the owner of them (via PG)

 

 

CB-nonokeepthepaintingon

*whispers* “No no…keep the paint on.” (via CB)

 

 

bandido-HOTNSFWifeellikeisraeligirlsdontgetenoughcreditforbeingsexybutthenagainiprobablyonlyseethesexyoneslikethisoneoremanuellechriqui

I feel like Israeli girls don’t get enough credit for being sexy but then again I’ve only seen ones like this girl and Sloan from Entourage so that might be a slightly stacked deck (via Bandido)

 

And there we have it, another week in the books. Follow me on Twitter to DM me your screenshots, thanks to everybody who sent things in, and happy swiping!