The Fact That Twitter Is Allowing People To Retweet Themselves Has Me Mad Online

I don’t often get mad about updates and things of the like, because I know in ten minutes I’ll forget that the world was every any other way. But, not today. Today I’ve got the time, oodles of it, to be mad online. Twitter allowing you animals to retweet yourselves is outrageous.

You know what it means if something doesn’t get retweeted a lot the first time? It means it wasn’t funny. Much like every other tweet you or I have sent in our lives, that one was worthless and no one cares that they missed it. Giving people on Twitter, where the most narcissistic people in the world’s existence already reside, the ability to say, “Hey. Hey! HEY! Did you see the moronic thing I said?!” is offensive. You’re essentially encouraging folks to be yapping little dogs only instead of a rather benign bark, it’s a stupid 140 characters that they, for some reason, find incredibly intelligent or knee-slappingly hilarious. It’s not. I swear to fucking god it’s not. If you never tweeted ever again, maybe three of your followers would notice, and even they wouldn’t be upset about it. They would just notice and carry on with their day. The simple fact that the PR phrase Twitter came up with, “Say it again,” shows you how worthless this feature it is. Because you know what needs to be said again? Literally nothing ever. Say what’s on your mind once, even though that was probably one too many times.

But just because they let you do this, it doesn’t mean you have to. Don’t be that guy. Don’t bring your bullshit back to the surface of the cesspool, let it sink to the bottom and be hidden with the rest of the garbage. If it were up to me everything we spew from our fingers would be erased in 24 hours, not given the ability to rise from the ashes.