When Having A Front Row Seat To A Subway Fight Goes Horribly, Horribly Wrong

Wait for it…wait for it…wait for it….CHEAP SHOT!

That old man clearly made the decision he was gonna swing on any Latino dude in sight. Anyone at all, really. Anybody that came within range was getting faded. Cant even blame him either. Good rule of thumb when you’re underground on the subway is to keep your head on a swivel and always assume the worst. Anyone and everyone could potentially be the guy who’s going to rob you or attack you or spit on you or something. And thats when your commute is going swimmingly. When you’re in a fight with a guy snapping his belt at you like he’s Indiana Jones with his whip, of course you’re going to assume the dude hovering is coming for you next. Clearly this dude was running on some old man adrenaline.

And clearly he was on his way to the bowling alley because that bag must have contained a bowling ball. I mean Jesus Christ that dude went to SLEEP. Dude came in like a wrecking ball. Only possible explanation is that he was heading out to the lanes with his custom bowling ball or that he was just carrying a satchel full of bricks.

As always the moral of the story is mind your business on the subway and always keep it moving. Only time you should ever be standing still underground is when you’re waiting for a train to arrive. And even then you should think about moving around just so nobody pushes you on the tracks. Bottom line is always keep moving. You gotta be like a shark when you’re on the subway. Keep swimming, or die.