If it’s Friday, it’s Top Pornhub Comments of the Week. Sure, our lives may not be as anywhere near as legendary as Jaromir Jagr’s, but at least we’re not commenting on internet porn. So in the grand scheme of it all, our lives are all pretty dope. Now we had to have a Bye Week last week because the comment section was running a little dry. I think they took that week off the right way and came firing out of the gates for this week. So let’s just jump right into it.
DicknChick has life all figured out. Not sure why I haven’t thought of this yet. Just adopting a full-grown human adult to be your slave. He kinda lost me at all the goat talk and I have to imagine he’s talking about fucking them. But to each his own.
Must be nice to be a girl. Just have dudes lining up for days to fuck you. Lucky…
That’s when you know you have to retire your dick forever. There’s just no coming back from that. None whatsoever.
Shoutout to Mr Finger III for keeping it real in the streets. Not that there’s anything wrong with it but if you put a dick in your mouth, you’re gay. Same way as if you white, you Ben Afleck. I don’t make the rules, I just play by them.
I wish gingers actually couldn’t cum. Because then there would be no more gingers.
WATCH OUT, GUYS. We’ve got ourselves a full blown Sex God on our hands here. Dude just knows how to do chicks. Knows how to do them in all different ways and positions. Can probably do chicks better than you can in his sleep. That first orgasm is like a stroll in the park for him. Not even a challenge anymore, he’s already onto the next one. Bet chicks already cummed everywhere just from reading that comment. And his last gf was black. Just saying.
Did you guys hear that Leicester City had 5000/1 odds of winning the EPL. I feel like people haven’t brought that up enough. 5000/1. Remember that number because it’s probably the last time you’ll ever hear about it.
Probably because she’s a stoolie.
I’m 99.9% sure that’s actually Chris Owen and I wasn’t about to let the Sherminator drop of pornog on us without at least letting the rest of you perverts know about it.
Never really thought about it before but does jizz work like that? I’m going to err on the side of no but the logic behind it makes sense. Kind of like when you drink a lot of milk and it makes you cum more or drink pineapple juice and ya know. Guess we’ll just have to let science decide this one.
And that wraps up this week in freaks. Thanks a lot to everybody for stopping by and I hope you’ve enjoyed your stay. As always, feel free to send any comments my way on Twitter @BarstoolJordie. Stay sexy out there and have yourselves a weekend.