When you nutted so hard that you temporarily became an unoperated Muppet:
I’ll be honest here up front: Despite (maybe because of?) Barstool’s award-winning coverage in dick-based blogs, it’s always tough to decide what’s a bloggable dick-related item and what’s not. We don’t need more dicks in our lives, I get it. But something about this video game livestreamer caught jacking it cracked me up and it seems relevant given that other gamer chick showing off her vag last week. It only lends more credence to the argument that I made in that blog that we’ve got to just let these livestreams go and see where it ends up. I don’t want to see this dude punished for his “accident” just like the other gaming girl. Where else online am I going to unintentionally see some neckbeard type flapping his chin fat like a blowfrog while focusing harder on pornography than I focused on my SATs? And then we get to top it off with him realizing he was just watched jerking it by however many other nerds in the last 15 seconds and awkwardly going “Oh hellooooo” in a silly voice? I mean come on. Perfect video for a dick blog.
Still, while I don’t think we need to ban this guy or anything, it’s sort of backwards that this guy isn’t getting punished for “accidentally” jerking off to an audience of people when that girl was suspended for “accidentally” flashing a little crotch. It’s the literal inverse of reality: We’re letting a wildly unattractive dude jerk off in front of other people (which is a fetish for some guys) with no punishment but an attractive chick can’t use her looks to get ahead? Seems a little weird to me, Twitch…not that there’s anything wrong with it but anything you want to tell us?
PS I’m getting more curious about this video game livestreaming thing for non-masturbatory reasons and I’m going to stream something this week to see how it works so follow me on Twitch if you want to give that a shot (or keep an eye on my Twitter). I see no way you have anything better to do than bullshit with me and watch another grown man play NBA 2K16 for 30 minutes, best way to spend one’s free time.