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Couldn't Possibly Be More Jealous Of The The Indonesian Werewolf Boy Who Is Revered As A God

(Source)An Indonesian teenager suffering from a rare condition known as ‘Werewolf Syndrome’ has rejected medical treatment and says villagers revere him as a Hindu God. Muhammad Raihan, 13, is covered in hair up to three inches long across all parts of his body, including his face and back. But the student, who also faces name-calling from some peers who liken him to Hindu monkey god Hanuman, claims it is a blessing from God. The devout Muslim, who lives with his widowed mum and four siblings in Mamburung village in North Kalimantan, said: ‘I am not bothered with such attention – some people laugh at me, others just come to me for a blessing.

How great must it be to be one of these little Eastern world freaks? You got a flaw, we’ve got a god for that. This fucking kid’s openly saying his one head is the will of Allah and everyone else is like Nahhhh, c’mon little Hanuman, we know you’re the Hindu monkey god. Quit pulling our leg. It’s basically what Catholics did to Jesus, we just drafted him. Yes we know you believe in a different religion but that religion is wrong, you’re our god.

Nonetheless, gotta be so freeing to grow up in this world where superficiality doesn’t exist. Not like that for me in America? I’ve had to wear a vest like every summer to hide my titties. I gotta hide my hands in every picture like I’m Uncle Jack because they’re so little and fat. My feet too. I don’t know what god that is but I’m sure the Indonesians have one for me. The god of big titties and swollen hands and feet. Oh, I’m the god of pregnant ladies. There. Boom. Already solved it. Enough being self-conscious for this guy, I’m the lord who oversees dilating milk ducts. You’re welcome, ladies.

PS – Give this kid a basketball and see what happens. Maybe pop him up on a van and play Surfin USA. Let’s just see how he reacts, little social experiment.