The New York Post Seemed Pretty Pumped Up About The "Matt Harvey Holding His Pee" Story

Damn you have to love The Post. Just pioneers in the tabloid game with the best headline writers in the world. So you had to know that a story about a star pitcher taking too long to piss probably had everyone in their office beating their dick as they came up with headlines. I imagine the headline writers treat stories like this like Michael Scott treats “That’s What She Said” set ups. And how they missed this layup is beyond me.

The only thing stopping The Post from being the perfect newspaper is if they could just publish whatever they wanted. Kind of like how if The Real World was on HBO. Limitless possibilities with sex, curses, and whatnot. But for now, it looks like PG pissing jokes are where they will have to draw the line. And the world is a worse place for it.