Mailtime Deluxe - "I Mixed Up Jon Snow And Peter North In A Convo With My CFO"

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KFC,

“I’m in the elevator with the cfo of my company. He and another guy are talking about game of thrones. Trying to make myself look good I joined in even though I don’t watch the show. I said something to the effect of “I love Jon snow” but I did not say Jon snow I said Peter north. I knew the guy’s name had something to do with winter and I remembered the “north remembers” shirts on sale and my idiot brain says PETER NORTH. Both of the guys just stared blankly at me and the rest of the ride was the most awkward minute of my life as nothing else was said. The rest of the day everyone was staring and whispering about me when I walked by. WTF do I do?”

Hilarious. Thats an all time slip up. Jon Snow > the North Remembers > Peter North. Just a couple of degrees of separation between the bastard son of Ned Stark and the most prolific cumshot canon the porn world has ever seen. This is yet another reminder of 2 Golden Rule’s in Cube Life:

1) Dont try to force small talk with co workers or bosses

2) Dont talk in the elevator

If you avoided those 2 situations, you wouldnt be the guy who looked directly into his CFO’s eyes and declared “I love Peter North” while they were talking about their favorite HBO show. I’m glad you did. Because its hands down one of the best emails we’ve ever gotten for Mailtime, but a lesson for the other kids out there – no chit chat unless its absolutely necessary. Because the reality of the matter is, guys like us, we’re disgusting perverted degenerates. So guys like Peter North and his porn victims are on our minds at all time. Every time you subject yourself to extra, unncessary chatter, thats just one more opportunity for you to slip up and let the real “you” out. The you that is still watching and thinking about this old school legendary porn star and his 8 or 9 ropers.

There’s plenty more on the rest of today’s Mailbox. What NOT to do if you rip your pants at work, what to do if your house is haunted. When are you old enough to drink Seltzer? Who’s really the bad guy when you sleep with your ex’s best friend? How do midgets run on treadmills? Is it a good idea to use a fabricated suicide as an excuse to get out of work? And much more. Its an extra episode for all the premium members, plug in juice up.

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