Nothing like a Twitter beef between an ex-NFL running back and a rapper to make you feel white as hell. I can usually find my way around a good Twitter battle, but I really don’t have much of an idea what’s going on there. I don’t know if the burnt/shreds tweet was an abuse accusation or just some graphic sex talk, but I’m not touching it at all. It also sounds like some girl named Esther is being accused of being a floozy and these two guys run in similar circles of women occasionally. But the three big things I took out of it were:
1. Girls are still being named Esther. Is that a real thing or just some sort of nickname? Because if it’s a name, that just blew my mind. Does she have a beehive hairdo too?
2. Charlie Ward is still a punchline to people. I remember hearing the “The best quarterback in New York is Charlie Ward but not even the best point guard on the Knicks” during the dark days Dave Brown and Neil O’Donnell.
3. Saying you were out getting eggs is a great excuse for going dark during a Twitter beef. Bread, milk, and eggs. Everything a growing man needs. And did you know supermarkets put the milk and eggs in the back so you will have to walk through more of the store in order to get them? More walking = more groceries purchased along the way. Diabolical. And my cellphone neverrrr works in the back of the grocery store. Drives me crazy every single time.
Still, putting the grocery necessities in the back of the supermarket is not nearly as diabolical as saying more people have been through a girl than the Lincoln and Holland Tunnel combined. That one gets all the skull and crying emojis.