Johnny Football Spotted Partying In Miami, Drinking Champagne From The Bottle, Wearing The Worst Hat Of All Time

Of all the things to blame Johnny Football for this past year, and there is a lot, I have to say, that fucking hat may take the cake. The drinking, the allegedly beating women (this is obviously the worst), the missing practices, the sucking at football, all of it pales in comparison to that hat. What even is that shit? Are you Pharrel? Are you Amish? Are you a Jew in Williamsburg? He looks like when a chick tries to wear a hat on any day other than Kentucky Derby day. Every guy knows what I’m talking about, when your girlfriend, wife, or even friend decides to try out wearing hats. “I think I’m going to be a hat girl, it’s just so fun”. It’s the less extreme “I’m going to cut off all my hair” move. Never ever works, always looks stupid and weird and forced, just like this. That’s not a hat a white guy should ever try to wear Johnny. Who are you man? If there was still anyone on this earth who didn’t think Johnny Manziel needed some help that changed after seeing this hat. That’s a man crying for help right there. That’s a “please have an intervention guys, just look at this silly fucking hat I’m wearing” statement if I’ve ever seen one. He’s basically begging for someone to set him straight. No white guy wears a hat like that and has his shit together in life. Dude is a mess.