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So I Guess Edward Snowden Used To Brag About His "Sexual Marathons" Online And Took A TON Of Really Creepy Pictures

 

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(Source) Edward Snowden boasted of sex marathons, enjoying post-coital Krispy Kremes and how employers ‘fight over me’ in a series of online posts made over the past decade, it has emerged. The National Security Agency whistleblower also voiced his concerns over government snooping on the ArsTechnica site as far back as 2006, joking to another forum user that officials were spying on him through his Xbox. Snowden, who is now hiding in Hong Kong after leaking information about NSA surveillance programs, apparently posted on the tech site 753 times in the last ten years,Buzzfeed reported. Under the name TheTrueHOOHA, he provided other users with advice on getting jobs within the IT industry and shared personal details about his sex life, last posting on May 21, 2012.

Among the most personal posts, he wrote that his ex-girlfriend would ‘kind of sadly paw at my man-totem like a cat after it has killed the prey’. ‘There have been times when I’ve have sex marathons from sundown til sunrise,’ he said, apparently joking that he once even had sex at an elementary school – ‘even on the playground’. He also provided some patriotic snacking tips for afterwards. ‘Go to your nearest Krispy Kreme Drive-thru,’ he wrote. ‘Pick up one of the warm “fresh of the line” ones and go put them on your nightstand. ‘You have not lived until you’ve rolled over to post-coital Krispy Kremes. That’s what being an American is all about. I recommend them.’
So here’s my question. If you’re some tech genius who is about to leak a bunch of top secret information and basically live the rest of your life running from the US Government wouldn’t you want to delete some of your old blog posts talking about your sexual marathons with donuts and creepy blue steel selfies? Just seems like step 1 in this whole process. Because at this point Edward Snowden has gone from a guy I didn’t care about, to a guy who had a hot girlfriend and 200k a year in Hawaii (kind of cool), to an absolute weirdo that is making me feel extremely uncomfortable. Like if you’re looking for even a second of sympathy from me you probably should have tried to get rid of your “So Sexxxxy It Hurts!” blog post
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Because now I don’t even know what to think. I mean let’s be honest here, you fucked a donut, I know you did. You can pretend you were just eating it but I know what really happened. You stuck your dick in a donut, and now you have creeped me out harder than anyone has ever creeped me out. Good work.