Rangers Announce Adrian Beltre Bobblehead Promo With Removable Helmet To Pat His Head

Adrian Beltre is easily one of the most underrated baseball players of this generation.

When it’s all said and done, he’s going to end up in the Hall of Fame. If it feels like he’s been around forever, it’s because he has. He’s been at the major league level since 1998 when he got called up at the age of 19, and has enjoyed continued success ever since. He led the league in home runs (48) when he was 25, he led the league in doubles (49) when he was 31, and he led the league in hits (199) when he was 34.

He’s also led the league in freakouts whenever somebody touches his head every year since probably 2010. See, this is where the Red Sox are just out of touch. Rangers fans get this awesome bobblehead where you can take the helmet off to pat Beltre’s head, and we get a new mascot that’s Wally’s god damn sister or something. I know it’s just a bobblehead and it really shouldn’t make me this mad, but it does. You know what Red Sox fans are getting as a promo this year? A Pet Brock. Get it? It’s a rock that has Brock Holt’s face on it. Pet Brock. Because his name is Brock and it’s a rock. Fuck, I want that Beltre bobblehead so bad.

Even Brock is acting like that little kid that opens a personally knitted sweater from his grandma on Christmas.