Abe Vigoda Actually Died
NY Daily News- Abe Vigoda is dead. Really. The dour-faced, slouch-shouldered New York-born actor who always looked like he had one foot in the grave — and who had long been rumored to be pushing up daisies — finally stepped into it when he died Tuesday morning. He was 94. The long-time television fixture’s daughter, Carol Vigoda Fuchs, told the Associated Press her father passed away peacefully in his sleep while staying at her Woodland Park, New Jersey, home.
Vigoda made his mark on the small screen playing the weary and bladder-challenged Sgt. Phil Fish on “Barney Miller” — and on the big screen playing double-crossing gangster Tessio in “The Godfather.” But for decades Vigoda was best known for not being dead. Legend has it rumors of Vigoda’s demise began way back in the 1980s when a producer declared “I need an Abe Vigoda type actor,” not realizing the man was still alive. It was actually a People magazine piece in 1982 that referred to the “late” Abe Vigoda that got the rumor rolling. Vigoda responded by posing for a Variety photo holding a copy of People — and sitting in a coffin. But five years later the Vigoda-is-dead rumor was revived when a New Jersey TV reporter referred to him as “the late Abe Vigoda” and waited a whole day to correct her error.
Rest in peace Abe, my old friend. That evil son of a bitch Death finally got your ass. I thought you would live forever like a vampire, but alas I was wrong. After starting your career as an actor (most notably as Tessio in The Godfather), you became a punchline for being able to survive countless hoaxes and just life I guess, no matter how many times people tried to say your ass was dead. Dude was the perfect age to be an old man in a nursing home during Look Who’s Talking back in fucking 1989! Also was a super old guy in Good Burger back in 1997, which was 19 years ago. Old Abe had that permanent Benjamin Button face going like Sparky Anderson and Marv Levy, just forever old. Basically the absolute inverse of Kate Beckinsale.
But after all the hoaxes and whatnot, the Internet was asleep at the computer when he finally died. Fool us once, shame on you, fool us 100 times and then actually die? Ummm, rest in peace I guess
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And then finally, almost a half hour later
Shit, now it’s real. RIP Tessio.