Attention Ladies Of NYC: These Two Russians On Craigslist Are Here To Warm You Up During Winter Storm Jonas
Don’t Get Fucked by Jonas, Get Fucked by 2 Russians Instead – mm4ww (Flatbush)
Forecast in. Looks like we all getting snowed in. Fear not, dear girl(s)! Myself and another comrade will help you survive storm this weekend. With vodka and 420 to start festivities, we do more fun later. Unlike storm, our inches guaranteed (and warm).
We want no one suffer in this mess, so come and bring friend or two if you want. This going to be small party, so please do not bring more male comrades, only nice devochkas. Please send email to ask question or share picture. We like that. Look forward to see you this Saturday or Sunday.
Fear not New York women. These Ruskie LeSean McCoys are here to make sure you make it through this blizzard OK. Sure some Russians in New York may have trouble adjusting to U.S. customs, but the blurred our faces and dick grabs through underwear just screams Adjusted Citizen. Plus there will be soooooo much 420 at this snowrgy. Gonna get high and 69 their asses off. I gotta respect the inches line, though. Guaranteed inches aren’t a thing many white men can guarantee this day and age, plus they WILL be warm. Because warm dicks are the best kind of dicks during sex. And it was a wise move extending the invitation to Saturday and Sunday. A wider net always catches more fish.
And you know that feeling when you are hoping for a snow day and wake up but there is no snow? That is how girls will feel times a billion if they wake up next to these two dickheads on Sunday morning.