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Remember Beyblades? Well They Get Ruined For You In This Edition Of Top P-hub Comments Of The Week

Phub-COTW

If it’s Friday, it’s Top Pornhub Comments of the Week. A time when we can all come together and realize that despite our differences, at least we’re not commenting on internet porn. Or at least the majority of us are not (looking at you, Simon). So to feel a little better about ourselves, here’s the best the freaks had to offer this week. Let’s get to it.

bey-blades
Link To Video

I believe in you, TheWetWitch. I really do.

farts
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1) hot girls don’t fart. 2) even if they did fart, they don’t make sounds anyway. 3) Imagine watching some good ol’ internet pornography and the first thing that pops into your head is what the chick’s farts are going to sound like after getting DP’d. Just a really bizarre life Inqx must live.

guy-fieri
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This comment comes off as a little too try-hard to me but that username/avatar combination is just too perfect to not include in here. I’ll never leave out anything that has to do with Guy Fieri. You have my word on that.

hairy-butthole
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nick-young-confused

horny-man
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Feel free to test this line out at the bars this weekend. You’re welcome for getting laid.

new-years-resolution
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Is it sad that I’m actually excited to keep up with this? Feel like we need to start throwing some bets around on when this streak is gonna come to an end. Also, obligatory Seinfeld reference.

not-hitler1
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Okay so I know the username here says that this isn’t Hitler but like… he definitely sounds like Hitler. Something seems a little fishy here.
not-hitler2

stoolie-find-blood
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Seems just a bit excessive, no? Like maybe don’t jack off 10 times in one day. Unless you’re a middle-aged, balding mogul who is trying to complete a silly internet challenge. (h/t Jack)

stoolie-find-math
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x = 69. But seriously, FUCK this guy. You wanna know the type of guy who throws around some ridiculous math equation in the Pornhub comment section just to look smarter than everybody else? Guys like this asshole

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goodwillhunting-ponytail

You like apples? (h/t Michael)

trump
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There’s like a hundred Donald Trump parody accounts on Pornhub and if we’re just playing the numbers game here, at least one of them has to actually be him.

And that wraps up this week in freaks. Here’s to hoping the whole Northeast being snowed in for an entire weekend brings an onslaught of more bizarro for next week. It’s shaping up to be a perfect storm right now so if you come across any golden comments, feel free to send them on over to @BarstoolJordie on Twitter. Hope all you perverts have yourselves a weekend and don’t forget to stay sexy out there.