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Philly Degenerate Rips 10 Shots Of Fireball After Every Sixers Win

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Listen up, Guido Joe. I love Philly. I love the Sixers. But to risk catastrophic liver failure for this franchise that has been failing on purpose for 2+ years now ain’t exactly my cup of tea. I respect the heart and dedication, but I actually want to live to see this team win 5 championships in 10 years. And if you’re gonna represent this fanbase in a tough guy act, at least choose a better “liquor” than what a flock of fur-pies would order at a Bachelorette party. Switch that shit up to Jack or Jamo like a man. In fact, if you do that I’ll take 10 for the Trilogy of Tank and do it with you. You wanna get nuts? COME ON. Let’s get nuts. We’ll both dance with the devil by the pale moon light and tank together.

NOW CUE IT THE FUCK UP.

PS – Legitimately shook that Joe’s place looks 100x cleaner and better than mine. If anyone needs me I’ll be in my shanty.