Why Are My Delivery French Fries Still Soggy In The Year 2016? - Mailtime: Figure It Out Edition

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Its 2016. We’re officially further into the future than Doc Brown and Marty McFly ever went. And yet every time I order french fries they show up inside a tinfoil bucket with a plastic top absolutely fucking SOAKING yet. How come its 2016 and we still cant figure out pillows? They’re either too flat or too thick. They make them in weird shapes or using NASA technology and still you cant fit the right fit. How come I still cant send a text message if I’m in an elevator or a basement? The list goes on and on. How are all these basic things still problems?? Figure it out, world! FIGURE IT OUT!

We also talk about the demise of Twitter, how fat I’ve gotten, how I hallucinate every night that I’ve killed my daughter, and much much more. Plug in juice up.