Cue the Duckboats | Championship Collection for Banner 18SHOP NOW


This Guy Is Sending Off Very Mixed Messages

Screen Shot 2016-01-04 at 12.42.06 PM

B911 - A man who was dressed as the devil and riddled with tattoos on his head has been arrested after causing a disturbance and locking himself in a supermarket. Michael Carter was sporting a red cape, red pants and a silver mask when he entered the Kum & Go store in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma. The 26-year-old, who has tattoos all over his face including the words ‘Jesus Christ’ and a picture of a scorpion, was initially approached by staff and asked to leave the store. But instead of leaving he locked himself in the shop’s bathroom and refused to come out, according to a report by The Smoking Gun. The Broken Arrow Police Department added on Facebook after Carter’s arrest: ‘Many people don’t believe this stuff ever happens, but it does.’

So ummmmm…how many Jewish stars cancels out 1 swastica? Is there a ratio? I tried a Google search but didn’t find any sort of ratio of Jew stars to Hitler worshipping. The Jesus Christ tattoo is a nice touch as well. I didn’t even see it at first, just so nicely blended in, props to the tattoo artist for a job well done. Which brings us to the funniest fucking part of it- him dressing up as the Devil and sipping on a soft drink:

Screen Shot 2016-01-04 at 12.51.43 PM

Why would you get all that work done on your face only to cover it up? Come on dude, if you got it, flaunt it. And it brings me to all sorts of other questions about guys like him—where do they get money? How do they buy clothes? Seriously, how does he afford those elaborate Satan costumes? I want to pick this guy’s brain. Did he go to college and one day decide to cover his face in swasticas and Jewish stars? I assume his job options are limited to making meth and giving ZJs, right? There’s definitely not a part of his resume that says anything about being proficient in Excel. This is the type of guy they need to ship to Area 51 and research, not throw in jail. And then we clone him incase the Aliens ever do come and attack us. 10,000 of this guy on the front line, the aliens will have no shot.