According To This Doctor's Dead Father, Donald Trump Is Quite Literally The Healthiest Person Of All Time


First things first- Is Dr. Jacob Bornstein, the doctor who wrote Trump’s perfect bill of health, dead? Yes. Yes he is.

Second things second- is his son, the other name on the practice, this guy?

Screen Shot 2015-12-14 at 2.07.57 PM

Again, yes. Yes that is Harold Bornstein.

And third things third- did Dr. Harold Bornstein start the letter by saying “To Whom My Concern”? Absolutely did.

But does any of that matter? OH HELL NAWWWW. Tiny things like a dead doctor writing letters to whom my concern about Trump’s perfect health DO NOT MATTER. A wise man once said you should be about telling, not spelling. And the facts are in the pudding- Trumpster takes aspirin daily, is strong as an ox and has the stamina of an African. He’s only had one surgery in his life and it’s when he was 10 years old and it made him bigger, stronger, and faster. If elected Trump will set the standard for health around the world. Elementary school kids will really have to work hard on their sit and reach and shuttle drill to get that President’s award, become Trump ain’t messing around with that. Every #hater and #loser will have to find someone else to pick on, because Trump is quite literally the epitome of everything perfect in the world.