This Absolutely Is The Face Of A Guy Who Got Arrested For Growing Psychedelic Mushrooms In His Apartment

GREENSBURG, Pa. —A western Pennsylvania man has been jailed after state troopers responding to a disturbance call say they found psychedelic mushrooms growing in the man’s public housing apartment. Forty-one-year-old David Kalb faces a preliminary hearing Dec. 15 on a felony charge that he possessed with the intent to manufacture 70 mushroom plants and 10 mason jars with related ingredients Monday evening. Police say Kalb was involved in the disturbance and invited troopers who responded into his apartment, where they saw the mushrooms — and a small amount of marijuana — in plain view.

That face you’re looking at is the face of a guy who refused to stop partying when all of his friends settled down with wives and girlfriends and families and responsibilities. He’s the guy who continued to live a certain lifestyle that is unsustainable for 99% of the population. At a certain point, and it happens at different times for different people, most people throw up their hands and say, “I can’t do it like I used to.  I can’t. I can’t party until 4am anymore. I can’t smoke weed all day every day anymore. My body simply can’t handle it” and they make a change.  That’s 99% of us. It usually happens somewhere between the ages of 25 to 30. That’s why if you’re in that age range all you see on Facebook nowadays is engagement rings, wedding photos and that one stupid fucking picture everybody takes where the guy is hugging the girl from behind with their hands on her pregnant belly. I bet if you go to Facebook right now and scroll for four seconds you’ll see two out of three of those things.

But David Kalb and the psychedelic mushroom farm in his apartment?  He’s the 1%. He’s wired just a little differently than everyone else and it makes all the difference. He’s 41 years old now and I guarantee he was the guy who always stayed for one more drink at the bar until the all of a sudden the lights came on and it was closing time while all of his buddies have been at home and asleep since 10pm. That type of continued behavior then brings about a thought like, “Hey, what if I started growing my own mushrooms in my apartment? That seems like a solid idea.”  Everybody has that one friend.  The interesting part for me is there’s a solid chance I’m that friend.