Jakarta- Yesterday, the National Police’s Public Relations Division issued an appeal to the public on their Facebook page: Please help us stop the sale of children’s clothes depicting pandas having sex. Well, they didn’t use the words sex or panda, but that’s clearly the danger shown in the picture they posted. But if the Indonesian police deem it authentic than that is good enough for us. Even if the photo wasn’t taken in Indonesia, the threat of panda sex kids clothes invading our country is still all too real. So we join with the police in appealing to parents and the general public – the next time you go shopping for kids clothes, please check closely to make sure that the cute animals decorating it are not engaged in coitus. And if you find that there are in fact depictions of animal lovemaking on your children’s clothes, please contact your local police station immediately.
Alright so it’s not clear whether or not the sex pandas shirt is real. But you know what is real? The Indonesian Police issuing a warning and a stoppage to all parents who are dressing their kids in sex panda shirts. We can’t just have kids walking around with pandas doing the no pants dance! If you see a child wearing the panda sex shirt, please report it to the police immediately. Here’s their statement
Solid police work. Protect and serve. I don’t know what goes on in Indonesia but I feel like there’s worse crimes going on than kids strutting around wearing a shirt with pandas fucking on it. Still funny. And I don’t care if the shirts are fake. They need to be real. It’d be a good way for parents to get a laugh while the unsuspecting children have no idea what’s going on. It’s like in all those Disney movies where there are hidden sexual messages sprinkled throughout them. Let’s start doing that with kids and their shirts. Who would that be hurting? Exactly. Nobody. Kids see a pink shirt with pandas hugging each other. Parents see pandas going to pound town. Everybody has a laugh.