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I Cannot Imagine How Great It Will Feel For One Of My Teams To Win A Championship

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To put it simply, it’s fucking unbelievable that the Pats now have 4 Super Bowls in the last 13 years. I’ve been alive for 26 years and the Pats have been dominant for the majority of my “I’m not a complete retard, only a semi-retard” life. Four Super Bowls. The city of Boston has what, 100 parades since 2000? The Sox breaking the curse, the KG/Pierce Celtics team, and the Bruins. I’m not even sucking Boston’s dick, I’m just stating facts. It’s unreal what has transpired. I’m 100000000000000% positive Portnoy sold his soul to the devil, but that’s not even the point.

The point is that last night, I partied with a bunch of Patriots fans, celebrating the Super Bowl. I am on record as hating the Seahawks- I HATE Richard “hey have I mentioned I went to Stanford” Sherman, and I despise Marshawn “please don’t talk about me while I make it all about me, me, me, look at me” Lynch. I could not be happier to see those scumbags lose.

I have literally no idea what it’s like as an adult to see one of my teams win. The closest I’ve gotten is the Caps in 1998 losing to the Wings in the Stanley Cup Finals. And in June of 1998 I was 9 years old. I could barely wipe myself, never mind fully understand the magnitude of playing for a Stanley Cup (though I do have all the game on VHS).

The Wizards have such a good team, I know they are close. The Caps have had some of the best teams of the 2000’s, including wining the East, only to lose before the finals in heart-breaking fashion. And the Nats. What can you even say? Heartbreaking how good those teams have been, only to fall short.

Literally in memory, the only championship I’ve won is the 2002 Terps. But even still, I wouldn’t even attend Maryland for another 4 years, so it’s not like my piles and piles of student loans paid for it.


Meanwhile Boston has been in 13 championship games in 13 years. Think about that. It’s unreal. It does not makes sense. Statistically it is an improbability. I want one of my teams to make the finals…at all…never mind 13 of them in 13 years.

So what am I concluding with? I am very happy for my friends who got to celebrate a Patriots Super Bowl last night. Which only makes me imagine how I’ll feel when one of my teams finally does it. I was beyond happy seeing Richard Sherman cry because he lost, I cannot imagine the feeling I’ll have when one of my teams wins. And I know all these years of waiting will be worth it.