Noah Syndergaard Is Absolutely Crushing New York City Right Now

Knicks vs Spurs Nov 2

Rangers Blues Nov 12

Knicks Cavs Nov 13

Giants Pats Nov 15

2 things I learned about Noah Syndergaard after this little tour of the best sporting events in New York City.

1) He’s living the goddam dream.

2) He really likes plaid button downs.

You know whats fucking hilarious to look back on? When Bobby fucking Parnell threw out Noah Syndergaard’s lunch during spring training to teach him a lesson. Fast forward like 9 months and Noah Syndergaard is probably on his way to being the biggest superstar in this city while Bobby Parnell updates his resume to make Subway sandwiches soon. For real, Noah should get to take a shit in Bobby Parnell’s lunch whenever he wants now. Like he can walk up to Parnell in the locker room and be like “Give it to me. Give it to me Bobby.” And then he poops in that lunch and hands it back to him. Hysterical to think that Parnell was acting like the authority over fucking Thor.

Hard to pick anyone over Noah when it comes to switching lives with anyone in this city right now. 6’6, 240, movie star hair, 100 mph fastball, and just 22 years old with your prime still ahead of you. Bumpy Syndergaard from some ranch in Texas just soaking in every single thing this city has to offer. Courtside at the Garden, walking the sidelines at Brady vs Eli, probably smashing everything in sight. Unbelievable life.