Remember That Time My Boss Said He Likes His Steak Medium And Burgers Well Done? Wait, Did I Dream That?
So yesterday was a tough day for meat, I think we can all agree on that. Human DNA in Hot Dogs, Bacon causing cancer, just a bunch of PETA crazies spewing propaganda left and right, trying to get everyone to eat Tofurkey sandwiches and a side of Kale chips. Anyway, last night Dave blogged about it and I sort of took a glance over his blog, all pretty normal, until this.
WHAT? Does my Boss. Mr. Nantucket, Mr. Pageviews, Mr. Make Fun Of Warren Buffet’s Cheap Seats, Mr. Common Man Is For Suckers, actually eat medium steaks and well done burgers? I’m not even trying to be a hardo or look down on people here when I say this but it needs to be said. If you go to a nice steakhouse and order anything higher than Medium Rare you have poor people scumbag taste and that goes double for ordering a hamburger well done. I get that some people don’t like their steak bleeding, I’m actually one of those people, but to sit here and tell me you order your steak medium and a charred hamburger is preposterous. I seriously am second guessing everything I thought I knew about Dave. How can a man lead a company of men when he’s not a man himself. This is almost worse than Andrew Luck ordering Chicken. And I’m not even one of those guys who tells people what they can and can not eat. I eat anything and everything, you all know that. But you can’t call yourself a mogul and then order a medium steak. Those two things are highly contradictory. You don’t get medium steaks if you’re over the age of 14, you just don’t. Next thing you know Dave is going to tell me he likes a side of Ketchup with his Filet. In the words of Vince Lombardi (h/t Chris Berman)
Little pro tip for everyone out there. If you don’t like rare or even medium rare, get medium rare plus. All the good steakhouses will do it for you, it may seem like a small difference but it’s not. Medium Rare Plus has double the taste of going Medium.