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The Saga Of Madam Fat Fine: Steak And Abortions, Vol 1...A Black Twitter Classic

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Last night was a banner night for Black Twitter. An all time classic. Bigger than the Meet Me In Temecula ordeal. Bigger than maybe any Black Twitter Saga ever. It began with this tweet:Screen Shot 2015-10-25 at 8.57.10 AM

 

“U a Flintstone.” The tweet that launched a thousand ships. The picture of that caveman steak came from @JamaicanHoney, A.K.A Madam Fat Fine:

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She’s super fucking fat, from Connecticut, a Patriots fan, and as we will soon learn, she’s not to be trifled with. Its rumored she is 6’2 300 pounds:

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So anyway, lets dig into the drama. Recap courtesy of Woof Blitzer on Twitter.  Ya Boy Skeete called her a caveman. Fred Flintstone ass eating that gigantic prehistoric looking steak. Madam Fat Fine responds:

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All of a sudden, Dominque From Brooklyn jumps in, and this is where shit really pops off:

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But wait, KFC! Who is Dominique and why did she get involved??? I’m glad you asked. Dominique used to date Skeete, and she had TEN abortions with him:

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She also apparently has her MBA:

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Riiiiiiight.

So now Madam Fat Fine smells blood:

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We’re not sure who Dana is, but apparently she caught the wrath of Madam Fat Fine. Nonetheless, Dominique From Brooklyn is not deterred:

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Brooklyn stand up!! The challenge has been laid down. The address has been given. Its Madam Fat Fine vs Dominique from Brooklyn. Now, for the sake of brevity I can’t post all of the tweets here today. Black Twitter is RELENTLESS when this shit goes down. I honestly had to sift through like hundreds of tweets to get the full story. If you want to search these people there’s like HOURS of reading material. But just know that people were taking sides. And Dominique From Brooklyn was getting CRUSHED for having 10 abortions:

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Now this is ordinarily where 99.9999% of twitter beefs end. Fat Fine is in Connecticut, Dominique is in BK. This is just trigger fingers turning to twitter fingers. Right? Wrong!

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She comin!!! Woof Blitzer confirmed via Waze that there was, in fact, an accident.

Finally, like 24 hours after this saga began, Madam Fat Fine arrives in Brooklyn!

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But alas! Dominique from Brooklyn is nowhere to be found. The chips were down and her Brooklyn crew never showed up. Madam Fat Fine calls them out:

 

Dominique from Brooklyn claims Madam Fat Fine took too long and she had simply gone to sleep:

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MFF is quick to point out that Dominique was tweeting not just 7 minutes before her arrival in Brooklyn.

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Caught! Cant hide shit on twitter with those timestamps, fam!

So as we stand its now 10am the next day, nearly 48 hours after the initial Flintstone Steak comment, and rumor has it Dominique from Brooklyn is now talking about driving up to Connecticut with her squad. Like a Home and Home series. Which is really the only way to redeem herself. You cant run your mouth and give out addresses and have your whole crew talking shit and then claim that you all went to bed right as she arrived. You should get kicked off of Twitter forever for that sort of false advertising. But I guess we should have all seen this coming:

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Bottom line is one day someone will ultimately die from twitter beef. It hasnt happened yet but it will eventually. And I guess my question is, should we feel bad for that dead person? After tweeting and retweeting and stirring the pot for our entertainment, can we be blamed? I say no. Like in this situation we had a woman who’s had 10 abortions. If that chick dies nobody cares. Karma. Whatever you want to call it. And on the other hand if Madam Fat Fine died, well thats really her fault to stepping to someone who’s killed 10 babies before. So either way whoever dies its kind of like “Welp you got what you deserve.” Let Darwin do his thing and weed these people out.

Stay tuned for more. I’m sure its not over.

PS – Reading Ya Boy Skeete’s timeline this morning was fantastic:

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