Michelle Wie Eating A Live Squid On Instagram Is DISGUSTING

Real quick here. I have very few hard and fast rules when it comes to eating. VERY few. Expiration dates don’t matter. Weird smells don’t matter. 99.9% of the time if you hand me something I’ll eat it. No questions asked. I’ll eat street meat by the pound. In fact, outside the strip club here they sell chicken and beef kabobs that are fire flames. Nothing better than walking out of a club at 4am covered in shame and glitter then wolfing down some meat on a stick.  That’s my idea of a good time. So I’m willing to eat just about anything and everything under the sun. One condition: the food can no longer be breathing or moving or know what’s happening to it. That’s where I draw the line. I need my food to be as dead as can be. I was barely able to watch that video of Michelle Wie. Why is that a thing? There’s no way it tastes better simply because it’s alive. It adds nothing. You’re just a sick bastard who wants to torture something in it’s last moments. Hard pass.

One other golf note while we’re here

Congrats to PGA Tour rookie Emiliano Grillo on his first victory at the Frys.com Open

He won despite almost murdering Rory on the 17th hole with his drive

On top of that he got a congratulations from Jordan Spieth after his win

What is Spieth referring to when he says, “Cool seeing the 11s always playing great”?  He’s talking about 2011.  As in the year all of those guys graduated high school.  Feel free to star crying now. 2011! Are you fucking kidding me? That’ll make you feel inadequate and unaccomplished on a Monday.